Anonymous sources say the darndest things: Barry Bonds to the Marlins

Source: Jason O. Watson/Getty Images
Source: Jason O. Watson/Getty Images

By Oliver Connolly, Editor-In-Chief

In our latest edition of “anonymous sources say the darndest things” we have the perennially dysfunctional Marlins, the perennial pariah Barry Bonds and our good old friend “Anonymous Sources.”

I love anonymous sources. Like really, I love them. I write this without a hint of irony. Anonymous sources give us some of the best stories of the year. Stories that are often too good to be true. Stories that make you think “is Rosenthal just tanked at a bar tweeting out stuff on his mind?” That’s what anonymous sources do.

Now they’ve served up a great story that is beyond transparent, and yet still wonderful.

Via Jon Heyman:

“In what promises to be a bombshell move, if executed, all-time great slugger Barry Bonds is under consideration to become Marlins hitting coach.

Team higherups have quietly been discussing this possibility for weeks.

Bonds, known as a brilliant tactician, has worked as a special spring instructor for the Giants on occasion. It isn’t known whether he’s willing to move across the country for such a hitting coach job, but he has been working on brandishing his image and has a keen love of coaching.

Frank Menechino is expected back, but the Marlins would employ two hitting coaches to accommodate Bonds.

Juan Nieves also is said to be among the top considerations for hitting coach.”

This is a beautiful case of planting a story. I don’t know which side planted it but I’m fairly certain it was the Marlins. The classic case of “holy shit, everyone thinks we’re dysfunctional. Let’s plant all our moves out there and gauge public/industry reaction before we make any moves.” I’m not mad in the slightest, I’m impressed. That the Marlins would have the presence of mind to plant stories is a step forward for a franchise who recently employed Dan Jennings as their manager (I still can’t believe that happened).

For Bonds’ side, and not that he cares, again there’s that sense of gauging reaction. Given that Mark McGwire works in the big leagues – recently hired as the Padres bench coach – then why shouldn’t Bonds. He is the greatest hitter who ever lived and if it leads to Giancarlo Stanton getting even 0.1% better who am I to complain?

My end hope, given the monstrosity of recent Marlins decision-making, is that Bonds is SO overwhelming good as a hitting coach, and SO much better than 7/9 of the Marlins line up, that they actually offer him a one-year deal. I’m not hear to speculate over how Bonds could do at age-51 in the big leagues. But I know it would be better than Stephen Drew.

Given that I just watched Alex Rodriguez rehabilitate his image after being busted with the biggest PED racket since Lance Armstrong and having sued everyone known to man (and perhaps those unknown). I would love to see Bonds take one more tour, as the most dominant over-50 to ever play the game.

Ok, it’s not going to happen, but one can dream. I for one fully back the Marlins pursuit of Bonds and given that I am a member of the public I’m pretty confident that those ‘anonymous sources’ are taking this into full consideration.

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